Perfect People

Wow- it has been a month since I have blogged! I know it has been busy, but where is the summer going?

My husband left for Kenya a few weeks ago and successfully lead another trip to and from Kenya. I was mentally preparing myself for this, but I will admit it was hard.

Just a little flashback here- Last year when he left for Kenya I suffered the worst two weeks of my life with Postpartum Depression. I was hospitalized for three full days.

The day before he left, I was so anxious. I had a meeting at work and I was so nervous about the meeting. Later we went to dinner and I couldn't get a hold of my thoughts. I helped him pack and went to bed feeling like a train wreck. I was so scared of "it" coming back to get me.  It was like when Phill is around, he is my protector. When he is gone, I am much more vulnerable.

The next morning I went for a run. I figured a run would get rid of all that nervous stress. I use exercise as a stress reliever and it usually makes me feel 80% better afterwards. As I was running, I heard a song by Natalie Grant. It is called "Perfect People"   It says, " There is no such thing as perfect people, there is no such thing as a perfect life. Come as you are broken and scarred, and be changed by a perfect God."

I love this song because it talks about how we try to be perfect and act like nothing is ever wrong. We hide behind "crooked smiles."  The truth is you will only exhaust yourself trying to be perfect.  The only way we are perfect is through God's eyes.

I kept running knowing that in a few hours Phill was going to be leaving. The song kept playing and God blessed me with this verse in that song, "Cause he knows where you are and where you've been, and you never have to go there again."

He was right... I did great!  I had a lot of friends and family checking in on me during this time while Phill was away. I knew what to do if I started to feel anxious or depressed. The kids and I had a blast. We were busy planning a rummage sale, going on a mini-vacation, and shopping!  I even got some "alone" time which I totally needed to recharge.

When Phill came back, I am sure he was relieved that he didn't have to bust me out of a hospital like last year!  I know I was sure relieved :)